Queenstown story

This my Queenstown story. Could you please comment if you think I used my goal in this story. My goal is I can use an onomatopoeia and I can use spicy adjectives.

Candy Factory

             Candy factory                                     

                      by      Kaisei & Harrison                      

Characters  .……Harrison Kaisei  

Once upon a time There was a candy  factory in a forest  . Harrison , Kaisei and ben were kids. they were 8 years old and they loved candy  .They found the factory by themselves and There was Candy everywhere!

There were…

Lollypops , chocolate , gummy bears ,  candy canes ,  gumballs , m&m's and lots  more.            

Harrison:

Then  ben saw a gigantic pool of chocolate, He wanted to  eat the chocolate. he was really greedy  and he never shared anything. So he Leant in to eat the chocolate then ! he  … he fell in , hahaha !

                                                                          

                                                                             

Kaisei: There was a twirly wirly machine   under the chocolate that keeps the chocolate warm and… he got sucked into a whirlpool that pulled him into the twirly wirly. He got twisted and turned and then he threw up . then His mum took him home.

Both:

The next day they made candy  .The candy was called………….Emotion candy………..Kaisei - explained  how the candy worked ‘When  you’re happy you  have a delight of lemon lolly tastes  and you turn yellow.

When you’re sad you have a nice taste  of blueberry and

you turn blue.

When  you’re angry you have a creamy sour taste  and you turn red .  

                                                                          

When you’re scared you have a  grape popping taste  and you turn purple and lots lots more.

                     

Kaisei:

After Harrison and Kaisei finished creating their candy lollies. They found a U.F.O so they hopped in. There were a  whole lot of buttons. They pushed one that was called candy cloud cocoland . In candy cloud cocoland  there were cloud lollies .

both:this is what harrison & kaisei traveled into   candy cloud cocoland.

 harrison:This is the cloud lollies that were in candy cloud   cuckoo land.

Kaisei:

Later Harrison and Kaisei  went back down to the factory . they

discovered  a four storied building across the road. inside the building there was a little teapot bang! a floating rainbow mouth wobbled out of the teapot Harrison and I jumped of surprise ! The wobbling mouth said you get one wish each. Kaisei and Harrison were bouncing  with excitement . Kaisei wished to reopen open the candy factory and Harrison wished for unlimited money so he could buy lollies from different countries . The mouth said it will happen in the morning so they went  to bed  with excitement ! The next day they woke  there was money everywhere and people were outside waiting so we let them in.There were lollies from Scotland, Japan, Usa, Alaska, Australia, Brazil, Serbia ,New Zealand and lots lots more! A lot  of people wanted a job so Kaisei was the interviewer.Kaisei hired 500 people . the factory got more people every day and lost people everyday.

             

         

             …......coming soon…….

…….Candy Factory 2……

              The end!

              By Harrison & Kaisei$#